Sometimes when I talk to my kids I have to restrain myself from what I really want to say to them. For example:
Dexter: (crying hysterically while he talks) "I bit my finger when I was trying to eat my lunch like cookie monster."
Me: "I'm so sorry, dude. You should try to be more careful. Are you okay?"
What I want to say: Duh! What did you think would happen while you shove giant amounts of food into your mouth while chewing all crazy? You're lucky you didn't pull back a nub!
Ivy: "My mouth feels hot."
Me: "Do you need a drink?"
What I want to say: How can your mouth possibly feel hot when you just ate pancakes smothered in syrup. Just ask for a drink like everyone else.
Me: "Did you brush your teeth, put on your shoes and go potty?"
Dexter: "You don't have to tell me everyday. I can do it without you asking me."
ten minutes pass...school time approaches...
Me: "Did you brush your teeth, put on your shoes and go potty?"
Dexter: "Oops...I forgot."
Me: "Well hurry up! Its almost time to go."
What I want to say: See!!! I freaking knew it wouldn't happen unless I continued to nag you about it. You'd be hungry, naked and dirty if I didn't remind you to eat, get dressed and wash yourself!
Ahhhhhh....I feel better now that everyone knows that deep down I'm kind of a jerk.
Happy Thursday!
3 comments:
I don't understand where your sarcastic remarks come from, Love it, really a fun read!
I find that frequently through a hard day I keep a running dialoge of the things I really want to say to my kids. I think it keeps me from going crazy.
For the record, I've accidentally bit my finger within the last year. Clearly I have no spacial concept. I feel bad for my future kids. ;)
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